


Swordsman's Shame

by animepseud (multipurposeroom)



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst and Humor, Hand-holding intensifies, Non-Explicit Sex, Romance, Sex, aggressive hand-holding, but wouldn't take this too seriously, general fiction rather than dedicated fanfic?, hand-holding, wouldn't call it crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-10-22
Packaged: 2020-09-29 17:16:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 16,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20439635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/multipurposeroom/pseuds/animepseud
Summary: One girl gains the ability to visit any fictional universe, and she chooses One Piece. Hijinks and existential crises ensue.





	1. Yes, I know Sword Art Online

It was a bar like any other.

Except I guess it wasn't. It was a bar that also served food, and looked like an American diner. It retained decor and furniture from their predecessor, which was, surprise - an American diner. I shimmied into a booth. Received a menu. Waited.

I unlocked my phone and looked at the clock. 7.15PM. Zoro's still face met mine with a smirk, as it always did. 

I was to meet a friend. An acquaintance, one might correct. One would be wrong. Snagg wasn't a friend, per se. But he wasn't an acquaintance, either. He was... Someone I had an unspeakable deep bond with, but wouldn't call if I were stuck in a public bathroom stall. You know? Like, he wasn't a friend-friend, but I had gone through certain horrors with him that wasn't just sitting through Introduction to Physics while being an arts major. 

I didn't have time to draw a chart illustrating Snagg and my friendship before he walked in. I wanted to wave to get his attention but was too embarrassed to, so I settled for sitting up tall and staring intently in his direction, like a meerkat. He came over. 

"Hey," said Snagg gruffly, as he inched to the middle of the seat.

I nodded by way of a salutation. We both ordered alcohol. He got a gin and Coke. I got a tequila and Coke. We both disliked Coke.

Before our drinks could get to the table, I decided we should get on with it. I looked at him intently. He returned the favour. 

"You called about One Piece." I said it matter-of-factly, as if I wasn't embarrassed that we were a couple of weebs sitting in a diner-bar pretending to be regular adults drinking soda with alcohol in it. Granted, we were actual adults, of legal age and all that, but that only upped the weeb factor. The magnitude of the weeb. The weebitude, if you will. 

"So. Y'know Sword Art Online?" 

I rolled my eyes. Yeah, I knew it. Snagg worked in video games and computing. Or programming. I don't know. He touched a lot of VR headsets in his job. His company was called Spirited, after Spirited Away, because of the lethal levels of weebitude in the boardroom. Oh God. Hold on. He didn't mean...

"Spirited has a One Piece VR game out? And you want me to beta it? And if we die in the game we die in real life?" I excitedly gripped the table. Snagg groaned quietly. Our drinks got expertly placed on the table with coasters under them. The waiter left. Snagg looked pained.

"Uhhh, no." He took a sip of his gin and Coke and made a face. "It's my own stuff. Not Spirited." I took a sip out of my own drink. Wow. Still don't like Coke. Snagg cleared his throat. I looked up.

"Listen. This is important."

...

I couldn't believe it.

Granted, I'd read a fair number of books and have watched an embarrassing amount of anime. Stranger things have happened in fiction. Yet, this remained unbelievable.

"So you're telling me, you've made a pill that can send my consciousness into any fictional world I desire, and I can spend a YEAR there for every ONE DAY in this here universe?" Snagg did a half shrug and nodded, the expression on his face signalling his admiration at my ability to sum it up in a sentence.

"I know you wanna say One Piece, though you've only watched five episodes of the anime and read up to chapter 450 of the manga," he added this second part under his breath, which I appreciated. What if fellow weebs were seated around us and listening? I did not need their judgement. Also, I was at chapter 492, but I did not feel the need to correct him. "But think for a sec. Could be dangerous."

He was right. This was entirely uncharted territory - his technology was entirely new and entirely not beta-tested, which was where I came in. No one knew what happened to my body if the other fictional body died with my consciousness in it. Would my real body die too? Would the consciousness return, like a soul? I didn't know much about souls.

I guess Snagg sensed my hesitation, since he pulled a single black ring off the stack of black rings on his pinky finger and handed it to me, explaining that I could see him at any time in my chosen fictional universe, if I were to just drop the black ring into any effervescent liquid. I briefly thought of Edward Cullen.

"So I can help. Y'know. In case you make any... ill-advised decisions," he added with a roll of his eyes.

I thought this over. I wasn't the type of person to make ill-advised decisions. In fact, I wasn't sure if I had made any ill-advised decisions in my time as a human being so far. The only time I can admit it came close was that one time at 15 years of age when I agreed to eat all the frankfurters in a bag of leftover frozen frankfurters on a dare during a classmate's birthday party. What business I had clearing out the sausages in this family's freezer, or even submitting to the whims of a bunch of people I didn't fully know the names of, I don't know, but I did know that it came to about ten frankfurters and I ate them all. Yes, they did me the courtesy of letting them thaw in a patch of sunlight for five minutes. No, it did not make a difference; they were still frozen.

This ill-advised decision led me down only bad paths, as all that came out of it was that no one had any sausages to eat for breakfast the next morning, and people called me "Germany" in the school hallways for the next week, since the city of Frankfurt is in Germany.

Just kidding. No one in that circle was that witty. They called me "Hotdogs".

That memory now fresh in my mind like soil from newly tilled land, I considered my stance on the matter at hand. Maybe an escape would be good. And all I needed to do was provide Snagg with updates after my journey. I could keep a logbook to keep track of all the issues I faced. And I had a full weekend to myself ahead of me, no plans. I could sleep the whole two days away. I looked down at my phone. Zoro smirked up at me.

I looked up at Snagg, with what I assumed was determination in my eyes. He nodded and pulled out a small Tupperware, with two tiny pink pills in it.

"One pill, one year. Two years in total. Ready?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> effervescent a la Edward Cullen: https://academyofbrokenhearts.tumblr.com/post/173552181923/cockmcstuffins-bella-was-lucky-she-didnt-have-a


	2. Join the Crew

I didn't take them there, of course.

I almost did, though. I had the Tupperware open and one pill in my hand before either of us realised I would be passed out on the ground somewhere, at some point during my fifteen minute commute home. It turns out two college graduates who both left their academic institution with higher than average grades could not counteract peak dumbass energy. 

I swallowed the pills at home, before laying down on my bed. I shut my eyes. The pills seemed to sit comfortably in my body. I guess. I wasn't retching or anything. How long would this take? Would it even work? I started to get nervous. What if I hated it there? Could I come back? I fingered the black ring, which now hugged my right ring finger. Snagg had instructed me to think only of the world I wanted to go to as I swallowed. What if he was wrong, and it mattered what I thought now? What if my thoughts go elsewhere and I go to the universe of like, Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki-kun, or something? OH GOD. I JUST THOUGHT OF THEM. WHAT IF I GO THERE? THAT'S JUST _SCHOOL_-

I blinked. That was weird. I don't remember what I was thinking about before this, but I had the feeling it was important. I tried to shake off the feeling and reached for my glasses on my nightstand, only to grasp at air. The heck? I turned to my left. There was no nightstand. There was just... A wooden floor. I was lying in the middle of some sort of wooden surface, alone. I immediately sat straight up and looked around me. Holy shit. I grasped at my face, where my glasses were seated, thanks to incredible foresight. Holy fucking shit.

I was here. I made it. 

I couldn't believe that worked. Not that I doubted Snagg, but I doubted Snagg. I pulled my phone out of my back pocket to take a photo. Well would you look at that. Our technology still fuckin' works. I even brought my charger like a goddamn genius. I took a couple of photos of the ship before putting the phone back in my pocket. I stood up.

"Who are you?" a voice rang out from behind me. I didn't recognise the voice. I turned around guiltily. Fuck. I hadn't thought this far ahead.

"Ohhhhhh! You're a beauuuuuty!" the blond man gasped, his hands clasped together next to his face, his heart-shaped eyes pulsating worryingly. Thank God. Sanji. Probably one of the easiest people to convince to let me stay. Well, besides one other person, I suppose.

"Yeah, who are you?" Speak of the devil. "How did you get on our ship?" Luffy stuck his head out from behind Sanji. I put on my most earnest expression as he came closer to examine me. It's Luffy. I love Luffy. I could handle this.

"I'm from another universe. I have really cool powers. I'm mostly a good person."

"Ooh, I see! Join my crew?"

"STOP RECRUITING RANDOMS SO EASILY!"

I quickly shake Luffy's hand to seal the deal as he was hit upside the head by a baton. I smiled at Nami. Do fictional characters have the ability to just appear at random? She eyed me suspiciously. I kept my smile.

"I have a lot of money."

"And? You won't manipulate me that easy."

"I am willing to give a lot of it to you."

"Welcome aboard, sister!" Nami slung an arm over my shoulder. "I always wanted another girl on the ship, didn't you, Robin?" smiled Nami, ignoring Sanji's violent nodding in favour of looking over at the stoic Robin who was standing a ways away, arms folded. Robin looked skeptical. She had every right to be. Maybe she could tell I was lying about the money and I couldn't afford so much as a Nintendo Wii. How, I didn't know. Maybe thanks to some sort of convoluted Edgar Allan Poe heart thumping? I had to prove myself, and quick. 

"Um." I looked down at my hands. They were empty. The sun beat down on us as everyone just sort of stared at me in mild anticipation. God, I wish I'd packed sunscreen.

Sunscreen appeared in my hands. Hey, it's my fancy one that I got from South Korea one time. Hold up. Why was I seeing it? Was I hallucinating? I grasped the bottle. Nope, perfectly tangible. Holy shit. I could... summon things? Was that some strange power I developed by entering a fictional universe? I could hear distant gasps. Oh right. I had an audience to impress.

Encouraged by my newfound abilities I focused my gaze on an empty patch of deck and imagined some One Piece currency. What were they again..? Right, berries. I conjured up the image of a sizable fortune in my mind's eye. Within seconds, heavy coins appeared on the deck in a sack, joined helpfully by a punnet of blackberries. 

Nami gasped in excitement, before rushing from my side to coo over the treasure. Luffy made a beeline for the blackberries. Before I could look at my hands dramatically to revel in this new power, a voice interrupted the pivotal moment in my character development.

"You're a devil fruit user." 

I knew that voice as well as I knew my own heartbeat. Hijikata Toshirou. Wait, no. I turned around.

And there he stood.


	3. Crisis

It'd been a couple months.

I don't know how long that was in The Real World. That was the name I gave the place I came from when I first got here, to differentiate between here and there when I wrote my logs for Snagg. "The Real World", and "AU". Because you know, I'm a nerd. That's why I was even here in the first place. But that name no longer seemed to fit. The "Real" World? How could I even make that distinction? The ship was real. The salty seawater that stung my eyes was real. That meat casserole Sanji made was real. 

Zoro was real. God, he was real.

I knew I was starting to blur the lines. I could tell just from reading my log back. The notes to Snagg started out clean, professional, telling him useful things about his invention. You remember your original life. You come with what's on your body and what you were holding when you took the pill. You are able to imagine things into existence. Then it wasn't so clear. Nami taught me how to use a log pose today, it gave me a headache. I passed by a street cart selling takoyaki, smelt great. Zoro let me hold his sword and it's heavy.

I was thinking, sensing, feeling, being in the moment. I was living. Here. Every time I logged something in my phone - which I could only charge after Franky stared at my strange device for five minutes and cobbled together a plug socket - was a grim reminder that I was to leave, to go elsewhere and.. I suppose never return? Or only return once or twice? I wasn't sure if Snagg made more of these, or how many he would let me have.

I sighed. That sigh was too weak for my emotional state. I breathed in deeply through my nose. Sigh. SIGH. SIIIIIIIIG-

"What the hell are you doing?"

I looked up from my seat on the deck. It was dark out and I thought everyone had gone to bed. Zoro looked down at me disapprovingly, clear evidence of my inaccurate assumption.

I liked Zoro. I enjoyed his mostly silent but comfortable company and his quiet strength. He was really the reason why I was even here, which made me want to be mad at him, but I couldn't. It wasn't his fault that I was, as a drunk Anime Club member called me once, "horny for Zoro".

I stood up. Zoro's eyes followed my face. His judging expression lingered, now with an eyebrow raised. I looked at his spiky hair, and felt an insurmountable urge to ruffle it. I thought back to The Real World. Fuck it. I'm supposed to treat this place as Not Real, right? I reached out and gave his head a gentle ruffle.

His expression shifted. It was surprise, I suppose, with a hint of embarrassment. Self-consciousness, maybe. I guessed he was blushing. It turned into a frown. He deepened his frown. It was too dark to really analyse the look in his eyes. I looked at them anyway, wondering how the heck I was ever going to be able to leave him behind.

Zoro suddenly grabbed my hand.

"Come on."


	4. Ice Cream Hands

I had no choice but to trot along beside him, almost being dragged along by his superior swordsman speed. I felt like a cart being pulled by a horse, except I was a willing cart. A willing carticipant? 

We were headed for the kitchen, I realised belatedly, as the doors to the kitchen from the dining area swung open under his palm. Zoro let go of my hand and headed straight for the fridge, with its giant lock on it. 

"Hold on, hold on, what are you doing?" I hissed, trying not to alert the entire ship to his thievery. "Sanji's going to be pissed." I regretted my statement immediately, since - with nary a pause in his step - Zoro told me what he thought of Sanji's opinion. Specifically, where he could shove it. I shut my eyes for a brief moment, as the unmistakable sound of a lock being clanged against a fridge made itself known in the silence, willing myself to not think about Sanji's butthole. I forged ahead.

"How are you even going to unlock that? Only he's got the key, doesn't he?" I questioned, at this point curious at what Zoro wanted to get from the fridge. He shot a bored look at me, a key dangling from his finger. I gasped. I couldn't help it. I didn't know there was an extra key! Sanji wouldn't even let me _touch_ his key, let alone allow anyone, especially Zoro of all people, to make a copy. I guess I must have complained about this aloud, since Zoro rolled his eyes and explained that Nami insisted on a second key in case of any Untoward Incidents and since the captain was the reason a lock was even needed, Luffy couldn't be trusted with the spare.

"First mate," Zoro concluded, by way of explanation, placing the lock on the counter and opening the fridge door. He reached in and pulled out some familiar tubs. I walked over and looked over his shoulder. Ah, they were the ice cream prototypes Sanji was trying to perfect after I had summoned Ben and Jerry's from-

I stopped short. I didn't want to finish the thought. Zoro turned to face me, sensing my stillness. He shut the fridge with his elbows and put the tubs down on the counter before re-locking the fridge.

"Get some spoons and let's go."

I hurriedly got two dessert spoons from the cutlery drawer, trying not to think about how mad our resident chef would be, and followed Zoro out the kitchen doors.

We sat on the empty deck, alone but for the now sweating tubs of cookie dough ice cream. We just sat discussing our universes and experiences, our principles and moral compasses, and our most loved and hated types of fish. Zoro didnt talk much, as usual, but his grunts and short sentences and questions led me to believe he enjoyed himself. I liked spending time with him. I felt like he felt the same. 

This made things so much harder. Already a few months had passed. A few more, a few more, and it would be a year. Then two years. Then that's it. The end. We were done. 

Never had I ever hated the passage of time so hard. 

I bit my lip and lowered my ice cream. I could feel Zoro looking in my direction. I looked into my tub and counted the globs of cookie dough. He let out a controlled sigh, before putting his tub down. An arm reached around my shoulders, pulling me closer to his warm form. I leaned into him, starting to cry. He didn't ask what I was worried about. I didn't want to tell him, either. He just let me sob quietly as I held the tub as far from my face as I could, until the sniffling ebbed away into a clearing of the throat.

I leaned back from him to look at his face. He returned the favour, a bridled energy thrumming under his skin. He raised an eyebrow questioningly, as if expecting me to say something.

"Your hand is cold." 

Zoro chuckled, returned his gaze to the sea, and pulled me closer.


	5. You Need Like, a Map or Something, Dude

How? How does one get lost so damn easily? Just... look at the stuff around you and make sure you keep on seeing that same stuff! Why did we have to take this giant detour on our way to the carnival, having to cross this shaky-ass bridge over the huge-ass moat filled to the brim with mean-ass fish to make sure our resident dumb-ass swordsman didn't die falling down a deep-ass hole in the middle of the damn-ass forest?!

Chopper and Usopp must have sensed my annoyance, because I was given a wide berth as I summoned a spear to, well, spear a fish.

The day started out pretty normal. Sanji made us all breakfast. Brook played us a new song he wrote. Nami announced that we were about to reach the island. "Let's go to the pirate carnival!" Luffy. "I want to go find cool ingredients!" Sanji. "Cotton candy!!" Chopper. Ha ha ha, said everyone. We'll have such fun, said everyone.

This morning felt like a distant memory as the sharpshooter, the ship's doctor, and the new girl all ended up sprinting across a bridge for dear lives over a river filled with said angry ass fishes. I leapt into the air, trying to avoid the sharp teeth of snapping salmon turtles, before landing back onto the thin planks of wood to continue running. Why was the bridge so damn close to the water? This fucking sucked. My lungs felt like they spontaneously developed bronchitis. Lactic acid built up in my calves and they burned with each step. Still, I knew we couldn't stop. 

If we did, the fish would just, you know. Jump up on the bridge. To eat us.

Secretly though, I was grateful for the distraction. I was trying to avoid thinking too deeply about the night before. Zoro and I fell asleep at some point during an in-depth conversation about eggs and when I woke up, he was gone. The ice cream had also left me, though I was joined by a soft blanket over my shoulders. Those were the only signs that it all happened and it wasn't all a dream. That, and when we were seated at breakfast, Zoro bristled over the breakfast option for the day and resolutely refused to pass me the ketchup for my scrambled eggs. Luffy had to stretch an arm over his head to retrieve it. 

Honestly, I felt kind of stupid. We didn't talk about romance or liking each other or whatever; it wasn't like that, but was I the only one who felt something? Or was it normal for people who liked you back to leave you asleep alone on a deck without so much as a note?

A salmon turtle flung itself from the depths of the water into my path, interrupting my train of thought. It flailed purposefully on the wood, aiming straight for my unprotected ankles with shocking speed. I shrieked, trying to step away from the massive beast, but it furiously shimmied after me, jaws open and ready to strike. Before I could raise my spear a tiny ball shot directly into its gaping mouth with deadly precision. The animal shut its mouth, confused, before immediately opening it again in an attempt to cool itself off from the spice. Smoke poured from the side of its head. It started crying. Or was that sweat?

Huh. I thought fish couldn't taste.

"Let's go!" yelled Usopp, giving me a shove. Right. Escape from the fishes. I heard the splash of a salmon being kicked into the ocean behind us. The brief pitstop did nothing to soothe my aching feet. We picked up the pace, tearing down the bridge, to get to the side island, to get to the forest, to look for Zoro, to bring him back to the Thousand Sunny, to sail back to the main island, to participate in the carnival.

God, why did I pick One Piece? Convoluted plans aside, the deadly monsters (both of human and beast variety) that could kill me at any moment plus the emotional toll of being wanted fugitives weren't really worth the excitement of being a pirate. The physical requirement of great stamina was really the icing on the cake I did not need. I worked in HR. My most exciting day was when Debbie met Debra and threw a drink at her. My most athletic day was being chased by an overly excited bulldog on my daily jog. I was so out of my element. What was I doing, coming here? 

I was ruminating on these thoughts as my feet hit the rough sand, following Usopp up the shore to a small forest. Now to cut through and find Zoro, then it was a straight route North to where our ship would be so we could have some carnival fun! Easy peasy! Go team! As if. Where the hell would Zoro be amongst all this tree?! If he was even in here at all! Usopp and Chopper quickly found themselves engaged in a heated discussion as I chopped away at vines in our way about whether we should all continue our somewhat low-key sneak through the forest, or have me imagine us a Jeep, except "I don't want to be attacked by those big-armed monkeys!". I left them to their strategy meeting, slashing through a particularly bushy leaf curtain, before my machete was stopped. The heck?

The leaves fell away to reveal a person who had stopped my weapon with his sword. I startled. Zoro stared back at me, one blade up in front of him. He looked mildly surprised as he sheathed the sword.

I looked at him for a brief moment. Emotions mixed inside my body like ingredients in a KitchenAid. Wait. Why was he facing this way? 

"Where the heck are you going?!" I demanded. "You're facing the EXACT OPPOSITE DIRECTION OF SUNNY." Zoro just blinked, then looked around him. I rolled my eyes and rethought my concerns about pirate life. I may not be a fighter or a runner or a criminal, but at least I sure as hell knew north from south.

I stormed up to Zoro, grabbing his hand, my confusion at last night forgotten in my annoyance.

"This is how we travel from now on," I said firmly. He looked down at our joined hands and back up at my face. Shock would be a mild description for the look on his face. "I'm not letting you go."

He examined my determined frown. An unreadable expression flitted across his face. Zoro nodded and let me march us through the trees, our hands joined, the faint chatter of the strategy meeting continuing behind us.


	6. I Don't Really Get it so I'm Just Gonna Panic

"It's a romantic thing, isn't it?"

I turned around. We were back on the ship and Zoro and I were standing looking over the side of the ship watching Sunny sail into the island's waters, our hands still joined. I hadn't really given the hand-holding much thought, the walk to the ship had been so long. Behind us, Chopper and Usopp were deep in conversation, casting surreptitious looks over at us.

"I can hear you, Chopper."

"No you can't, I'm whispering!" said Chopper at a regular speaking volume, his hoof held up next to his mouth in a way one would do with their hand if they were indeed whispering. I rolled my eyes and turned my back to their extremely unsubtle conversation. Heat pooled in my cheeks.

I didn't know if my holding hands with Zoro was a romantic thing. After we joined hands and started traipsing through the forest, Usopp started complaining that his legs were tired and now that we had Zoro, we really didn't need to worry about the big-armed monkeys that lived in the forest, which according to Robin, happened to hate fast moving vehicles. Chopper seconded the motion, and they both looked at me with pleading eyes, requesting that I summon a Jeep. 

Though Chopper pronounced it "cheep", which, while adorable, Jeeps certainly aren't. Cheap, I mean.

I summoned the Jeep. They fought over who should drive. Usopp drove. We rolled through the bumpy terrain for not more than two minutes before Zoro had to get out to fight off the famed big-armed monkeys...

Taking me along with him. I stared at him in disbelief when he exited the car holding my hand. 

"This how we traveling from now on, right?" he growled, while slashing away at the feral animals. I was pretty sure I blushed at his offhand comment. Trying to hide my obvious and sudden shyness I offered to help, but he just gripped my hand tighter and held me behind him. 30 seconds. The big-armed monkeys lay scattered around the area, unconscious but otherwise unharmed, and Zoro pulled me back into the backseat. 

"Drive."

Usopp drove. I summoned up Taiko: Drum Master on Switch for Chopper to scare off any more of the monkeys, and we traveled all the way back to the ship in a companiable silence. 

Just kidding. Chopper played Material Girl 50 times because he kept missing the rim. Usopp was ready to jump out of the Jeep and leave us rolling to our deaths by the third play through. In an attempt to save Usopp from turning into a mass murderer I tried to persuade Chopper to try another song. Somehow, in the chaos, Zoro had managed to fall asleep, his hand still gently gripping mine.

...

WAS it romantic?!

I mean, it definitely felt nice, and I enjoyed it, but I was also 100% Horny For Zoro. I didn't know if he felt the same. Romantic hand-holding was a two way street. It takes two hands to... hold hands romantically. I didn't know why he was going along with this hand-holding shebang. I said it in a fit of anger, really. Honest. I didn't have any ulterior motives at the time. I was genuinely just annoyed that he managed to get himself that lost in such a short amount of time. 

Now, I just felt kind of slimy enjoying it. He probably felt bad about inconveniencing the three of us, or something, considering that we had to make such a long trip just to go get him. (Which, hello, proves my point - how does one get _that_ lost?) 

Granted, he didn't seem... Angry at it. In fact he seemed to like getting us into situations where having only one hand would be an inconvience, then take pleasure in doing some problem-solving. Like when we got back on the ship and had to bring the Jeep with us to let Franky scrap it for parts. It would make sense for us to let go so that Zoro could heave it up with his superior strength. So I started to let go of his hand, only for him to tighten his grip and tug me closer while he gave the matter some thought. He wanted to just carry it on one hand as he climbed up the ship, which I vetoed. There was no solution. We stood there for six full minutes. He ended up getting Luffy and Franky to lift it into the ship as he supported it from below with his free hand, and had the cheek to look pleased with himself.

But we weren't in a relationship. Only people in relationships held hands romantically. Right? Hell, holding hands was for at least those who had confessed feelings for each other. At least to someone like me, who generally avoided physical contact. The whole Jeep thing was probably just to mock me for my dumb anti-getting-lost methods. God, I was really letting this get to me. I should really stop obsessing over this in case I freak ou-

"She looks embarrassed."

"It's definitely romantic."

"It is not!" I spun around. "This is not a romantic thing. It is completely a friendship thing. It's just to prevent him from getting lost. You know how he gets. All lost and stuff. This will keep him near us. And not lost. Elsewhere. Not with us. Us friends." I let my voice trail off. Usopp and Chopper just looked at me, clearly unconvinced. I looked up at Zoro, who was looking stonily at the sea.

"Right, Roronoa? Back me up here," I joked, laughing uncomfortably. 

Just as I was about to tighten my grip on his hand to get his attention, he let go for the first time since I started holding his hand. What? My hand missed the warmth of his instantly. Zoro leaned his arms on the railing. He kept his eyes on the ocean.

"Zoro?" I took a tentative step towards him.

"Luffy's calling," he stated, voice devoid of emotion. Zoro turned from me, striding in the direction of the captain who was engrossed in examining the Jeep with Franky, without a single glance my way.


	7. Oily Man, Oil Me a Man

"Another one!"

"Sanji, I can't keep making more. If I think too hard about the same thing it starts getting messed up in my imagination and comes out all wonky."

"Just one more! I promise I just need this last one to get it right!"

I sighed and concentrated, looking at the empty plate in front of me. A banh mi sandwich appeared on it, looking a bit more rectangular than it probably should have. Sanji excitedly reached for it, snatching it off the plate to compare to his ongoing pâté experiments.

I stifled another sigh and poked at some crumbs on the plate.

The rest of the crew were down on the island, leaving Sanji and I behind to protect Sunny. Zoro was initially going to be the one to stay behind with me, but it was revealed that the carnival didn't really sell anything that could be constituted as "ingredients", just fair food (much to Chopper's delight). Plus, more importantly, the moment the ship docked at the harbor, Zoro was the first to jump right off, ignoring everyone's calls.

Probably my bad. Not that I really got why.

I mentally shrugged and picked up my new copy of Pride and Prejudice to take my mind off things. Wow, I really want to know what's in Darcy's letter. Will the book ever show us? Like, what's he thinking? What's the rationale behind his actions? Why would he help? And then just jump off our ship? After we bonded? Like, is it because I made such a big deal about him getting lost?

Wait. Fuck.

I put the book down. This was hopeless. It was probably best that I sit and ruminate in my thoughts.

Things had gotten super weird since the whole hand-holding thing. Zoro had disappeared for ages after letting go of my hand. Every time I looked up expecting to find him talking to Luffy or bickering with Sanji left me disappointed. I saw him a total of one and a half times in those hours. Once was when he had to emerge to help Nami with a sail. The half was me having a longing look at a photo of him on my phone.

It was when the ship got really close to the main island and everyone crowded over to watch us pull into the harbor that I found myself next to him again. 

And I really wanted to hold his hand. 

O.K., I know. It sounds pathetic. But hold on. Listen. ... ..I mean his hand's just really nice. It's big and warm and also calloused, yet not dry or sandpapery. Also the human attached to it is a great, strong person whose loyalty for the captain is unparalleled, and would go out of his way to comfort a crew mate, no questions asked. I guess I couldn't help but try to reach for him, since he suddenly moved his hand out of the way.

"We're on the ship, you know. I can't possibly get lost here."

"He couldn't possibly get lost here"?? Ugh! I lowered my forehead to the kitchen counter at the memory. He'd sounded so bitter. I guess I shouldn't have made such a big deal about him getting lost. After all, he had all that time of losing his way with this crew way before I showed up, and he would probably have a whole lifetime of losing his way with this crew after I leave. Who was I to dictate the degree to which he could get lost? I was a nobody. He _should_ be mad at my condescension.

It didn't hurt any less, though.

"Hey, all the previous ones didn't have raisins in them." Sanji's voice woke me from my thoughts. 

"What? Banh mi doesn't ha-" The kitchen door slammed open before I could finish my sentence. Luffy stalked in, a giant kebab in one hand and some sort of roasted turkey leg in the other. He had meat grease all over his cheeks. He had also obtained a new vest and was wearing a massive hat which somehow fit his head, but had the widest brim in all of the Grand Line. He looked like a horizontal Doug Dimmadome.

Sanji looked up at him, one eyebrow raised in clear judgement. I don't think Sanji liked the hat.

"What's with the hat?" Sanji did not like the hat.

"My hat is under this one," explained Luffy, providing the answer to a question no one asked. "Hey, Zoro's gone missing again." He directed this last bit at me.

I sat up immediately.

"What? Why? Is he okay?" I pressed, almost frantically.

Luffy shrugged noncommittally, his shoulders almost reaching his ears, an annoyingly comical expression on his face. He took a bite out of his turkey.

"Will you go find him?" asked Luffy, his features arranged into a quizzical look. The grease gleamed confidently on his face, a stark contrast to his blank eyes.

Wow, I didn't realise Luffy was so perceptive. It was nice that he had sensed some tension between his crewmates and wanted them to clear the air. How sensitive he was to our emotions. It was sweet. It was delicate. It was ... So Not Luffy. 

"Who got you to tell me this?" 

"Robin," garbled Luffy around some kebab. "I didn't wanna come back to the ship at first but she said I should ask Sanji to get me a sack so I can HOLD! MORE! MEAT!" He punctuated this last part with fist pumps, jabbing meats into the air triumphantly.

Robin. Of course. 

It didn't take me long to find him. He wasn't lost after all. I walked up to the carnival game where Zoro was intently shooting at some rubber ducks. He must have been here for ages. People were giving him scared looks as they passed. There was a metre-long radius of empty space around him.

The operator looked up from his worried arm-wringing and perked up seeing me stand so close to the intimidating green man with a weapon in his hands and three swords on his belt.

"Miss! This your boyfriend? I think he's played enough!" 

Zoro looked up from his rifle and saw me. He rolled his eyes and went back to the gun.

"Greasy bastard," he muttered under his breath, pulling the trigger. The rubber duck shot off the train carriage it was balanced on and bounced away into oblivion, leaving the model train to chug off alone. 

"You uh, you win! Again! Wha-what'd you like, sir?" stammered the operator. He looked at me, then back at Zoro. "N-not... More bullets..?" His voice was fearful, but also resigned.

Zoro huffed in annoyance, before catching my eye. He gestured at the prizes with a jerk of his head, arms folded. I marveled at the array of stuffed toys hanging all over the booth. Monkeys. Turkeys. Salmon turtles. I pointed at a reasonably sized stuffed lobster, and the operator excitedly pushed it into my arms, glad to facilitate the swordsman's departure from his shooting gallery. 

I stood for a moment to admire my lobster's strong claws and shiny beady eyes, only to look up and see that Zoro had walked off. I quickly followed in his footsteps.

"Quit following me," he growled.

I shook my head stubbornly, quickening my pace to keep up. Robin might have just wanted us to make up so I would stop casting longing looks at him over my book, but I also had a responsibility to make sure he didn't go off into the distance and find himself in the middle of a desert, or something, somehow.

Zoro stopped in his tracks. I almost ran right into him. He turned to glare at me, his handsome features moulded into a deep scowl. If I didn't know him so well, I would have been intimidated. He seemed to hesitate for a microsecond, but that dissipated instantly. His hand shot out to seize mine. He raised my own hand to my face, kind of roughly. 

"This all you wanted? To prevent me from getting lost?" he demanded, taking a step towards me and leaning into my space, anger twisting and melding with his rhetorical question. I was taken aback. Was he really this mad at me? Why? Was I wrong in trying to protect my fellow crew member from disappearing into the depths of the unknown?! I suddenly felt a swell of defensive indignation. I closed the tiny gap between us.

"I'm sorry I stuck my nose where I shouldn't have! I'm sorry for being so condescending! I'm just sorry! Is that what you want?"

"No! I just want to hold your hand for no goddamn fucking reason! That's what I want!"

WHAT?! WHAAAAAT?!

ZORO LIKES ME? RORONOA ZORO? DOES HE LIKE ME? WAS THAT WHAT HE MEANT?!

More "whaaaat"s echoed in my brain for the next half a second, before the urge to kiss him on his dumb lips whacked me into motion. I pulled Zoro down so his face was right in front of mine, and leaned in.

Hold up. This was dubious consent. Dubcon, in certain circles. What the hell was I doing? I couldn't just lean in and kiss him. What if he didn't want this? We stared at each other, our lips inches apart. Both of us were breathing heavily. I broke the silence first.

"Why aren't you moving away?" I whispered. 

"Why aren't you coming closer?" he responded.

I leaned in and kissed him, feeling my existence melt away into nothing as he held me. I felt him pull me closer; we were tangled in each other, yet I felt like I couldn't get close enough. Nothing mattered besides the heat of his mouth and the strength of his arms. We broke apart. I stayed in Zoro's arms and looked at him. He was still breathing hard, searching my face in anticipation. Reality bled in from the sides as the faces in the crowds around us faded into my peripheral vision and instinct reminded me to be embarrassed. I tightened my grip on my stuffed lobster. I started to pull away.

Zoro held my face and kissed me again, deeper. He pulled back, stroking a thumb over my cheek.

"I won't get lost if you stay with me."

He held out a hand. I took it. We started to walk back to the ship.


	8. The Whis-key to His Heart (is Through His Liver)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluff. Doesn't forward the plot, just wanted to write it. Cool thanks

I swirled my drink around in my glass, before taking a slow sip. Mm.

"So that's why people think I'm really chill and cool, but it's all a lie."

Zoro stared at me in utter disbelief, the tumbler of whiskey completely still in his hands. A beat.

"...What the fuck?"

"What?" I asked defensively. "You don't ever get worried that when you have large reactions to things it will cause you to fart and therefore decide to never react to things anymore?!"

A melting ice cube clinked to the bottom of his glass. Another second passed. Zoro blinked. He opened his mouth to say something, then decided against it. He shut his eyes for a brief second, shaking his head.

He put his glass down in front of me, silently imploring me to just make the damn drink.

I shrugged and tried to picture _just the whiskey_ in a glass of whiskey. A tumbler with ice appeared. Ugh. I was really trying to focus on making the thing instead of the thing with all the fixins around it, because it was time to stop manifesting things into existence that we had to keep somewhere or throw out. Talk about generating waste. I looked up at Zoro in disappointment. He patted my head as if to tell me I would get it next time. 

I passed him a glass of Monkey Shoulder and watched as he tried it. I picked up my glass of Jose Cuervo (Gold, of course. Silver tequila? Psh.) and pineapple? juice to take a sip. Sanji kept some weird stuff in the fridge. Pineapple? juice aside, he had a bunch of frozen butter discs, a giant squid leg, and for reasons I did not want to explore, a single boiled egg with a bite taken out of it just labelled "hehe". Next to...whatever that was was also the banh mi sandwiches he had been experimenting with, which entered the fridge just this morning. Essentially I just told him Zoro and I wanted to stay on the ship and he could go explore the carnival. He was so mad at the raisins at this point that he was glad for the escape. Oops.

Zoro downed the rest of his Monkey Shoulder and tapped his empty glass of Hibiki, to signal his preference. Of course. I rolled my eyes to hide my smile.

"Thought you would like that one the most. It's Hibiki. Japanese."

Zoro looked pleased and did a mock approximation of a bow as if he had anything to do with the production of Hibiki whiskey. He picked up the glass to get the last drops of it. I motioned for him to put it back down so that I could attempt to summon some Fireball - just the liquid this time. As I concentrated, I figured this was probably a strange first date. 

When we had successfully (and easily) found ourselves alone, I'd decided that this was a good time to have our First Date. His confusion at my insistence to have one was palpable, but he had been otherwise open to the idea. The problem, as it usually was, was what to do on said First Date. The only thing I could think of was a dinner and a movie. But they didn't really do movies here. And the only dinner options seemed dismal. I sure as hell wasn't about to bring a whole ass movie theatre into existence just so we could watch 50 First Dates while eating banh mi prototypes.

Zoro had chuckled in response to my thought process. I had given him a questioning look. "Your world's weird," he'd smirked.

"Excuse me," I had retorted, the irony lost on me in the moment. "You would absolutely love it. Do you know how many species of alcohol we have there? Like, at least 60 popular types."

Zoro had folded his arms and looked unimpressed.

"Each type has hundreds of styles."

I had been asked to prove it. And here we were, fifty ice cubes and a bunch of whiskeys later, at my very own makeshift alcohol brewery (which, according to Zoro, was "kinda hot").

"Stop." Zoro held a hand up in front of my face to stop me from bringing yet another whiskey tumbler into the world. He got up from his perch opposite me and came to my side of the counter. He stood next to me and pushed all the glasses out of the way, leaving only one.

"Focus." He was now standing a bit behind me, arms folded. He nodded at the glass.

All right. Go time. No more distractions. I shut my eyes and imagined the Fireball bottle. Right, there's some cinnamon-flavoured whiskey. Now for the flow of the beverage into the glass. I focused on just the flow of liquid and opened my eyes. Flow into this glass in front of me, alcohol.

Whiskey flowed into the glass until I turned my mental tap off. I did it!

"Yes!" I gave a little hop of joy, spinning around to face Zoro. He patted my head, looking proud. He watched me for a moment, his hand in my hair, before he stepped around my celebratory dance and reached for the glass to sip at the Fireball. He pulled a face and shook his head. I took that as a big no for cinnamon-flavoured alcohol. 

I mentally celebrated my small victory some more, thoughts of all the practice I could do filling my head. I could schedule in some training time by making people things: specific machine parts for Franky so he could upgrade his weapons, guitar strings for Brook so he could restring his guitars, guitar strings for Nami so she could strangle Brook when he asks to see her underwear, weights for Zoro, he burned through those like nobody's business... Wait. Weren't we supposed to be on a date? I stopped dancing.

"This isn't very romantic, huh?" I sulked. Zoro looked up from the empty glass of Fireball, which he seemed to have polished off anyway. 

"No?" He raised an eyebrow and put the drink down. "Okay. Leave it to me."

Zoro proceeded to pull me into his arms to kiss me. I felt like I could get literally drunk off the alcohol on his breath, figuratively drunk off tasting the cinnamon on his tongue. Heat accumulated in my chest and spread to my fingertips like a raging fire. He pulled away to watch my face. I gazed back at him dumbly, eyes darting down to his lips. God, I could do this forever. I leaned closer to kiss him again. 

"HELLO!"

Zoro and I snapped apart guiltily. Crap.

A silence ensued as Sanji and Chopper stood in the doorway, taking in the scene in front of them. Chopper very slowly raised a hoof to the side of his mouth. I put my head in my hands.

"YES CHOPPER IT'S A ROMANTIC THING."

Chopper lowered his hoof.

I didn't want to have to let the crew know this way. Honestly, I didn't really give the crew much thought. We were like, 7 hours into this relationship at this point. Was this even a "relationship"? What even were we? Shouldn't we be, I dunno, tiptoeing around each other in front of the crew and then making out passionately behind closed doors for at least five months before we had some sort of dramatic reveal that would occur awkwardly around a dinner table, only for someone to object and throw money at my face to leave him, or something?

"Get out of my way marimo bastard." Sanji elbowed Zoro aside to unlock the fridge. "He's like a log, you shoulda chosen me," he winked, against his better judgement. Zoro stepped towards him, presumably so they could get into a fight, before Luffy burst into the kitchen.

"Sanjiiiiiiiiii, dinner pleaa-"

Zoro took my hand and walked us into Luffy's path, stopping his drawn out whine. My eyes snapped up to Zoro's face in shock, only to see nothing but determination in his expression. I turned my attention to Luffy, absorbing some of that determination. Luffy looked down at our joined hands and back up at our faces. He gave us a thumbs up. Zoro didn't budge. Luffy cocked his head at Zoro, confusion clear on his face.

"Luffy, two of your crewmates are together. You're the captain. Say something."

"...Congratulations?" shrugged Luffy, before attempting to sidestep Zoro to get to the now open fridge and sizzling pans.

"That's it? You're okay with this?" I looked guiltily at our nonchalant captain.

"Of course! You think too much," he said, pointing at me, "and you don't think at all!" He directed this at Zoro. "You're perfect for each other. Don't break up or it'll be weird. Now come eat dinner!" Luffy finished with a wide grin, reaching a stretched out arm to catch the plate of food that Sanji had dropped when he burst out laughing, before turning to leave. Was this what it felt like to be roasted? Curious, I looked up at Zoro. He was still, like a statue of Adonis, looking blankly at the closing kitchen doors. It might have been his first time being insulted by Luffy. The man to which he was so loyal. Oof. I could hear Sanji screeching in the background. "From the man who's so stupid!" he was howling.

Zoro slowly turned to me. I scanned his face worriedly. Before I could say anything, he reached behind him for a glass. His expression remained blank and his eyes unseeing.

"Hibiki, please." 

I quickly filled his glass to the melody of Sanji's hysterical laughter.


	9. Wait, I Haven't Said I Liked You Yet

"It's the last day of the carnivaaaaaaal," whined Luffy. "I haven't had my fill of meat yettttttttt."

"Luffy, the kebab dude is closed today, remember? You cleared him out."

This did nothing to appease Luffy, who was now rolling on the floor in despair. No one paid much attention to him as we passed him by. Franky seemed to feel no regret for his words as he stepped over the captain's writhing body to wave at the rest of us as we disembarked, having offered to guard Sunny on the last day of the carnival and secretly happy to stay to tinker with the tech he had collected over the past few days.

We split up. Usopp and Nami went clothes shopping (with Sanji trailing lovingly behind her) while Brook and Chopper joined Robin on her history trek. Zoro and I were left to weave through the streets packed with stalls selling food and knick-knacks. Lights littered the night sky, emanating from lanterns swaying on poles and little bulbs lined up on strings that were hung in zigzag patterns over our heads.

We walked through the crowded streets, hand in hand, basking in the warmth of all the soft lights. A translucent butterfly lantern caught my eye, its beautiful orange and purple cellophane wings aglow, lit from the inside by a single tea candle. The flame flickered and danced, as if beckoning me toward it. I stepped closer to have a look, only to accidentally walk into the path of a large man with wide shoulders and an even wider moustache. 

"Hey!" he complained. The man looked down at me, scowling. I looked up, apologies tumbling from my mouth like a drunkard from a bar. Hey, hold up. This was the guy that sold kebabs. He was still wearing his kebab shirt and apron. I supposed he was taking his time to visit around the festival now that he didn't have to work. He took a good look at my face, then cracked a suggestive smile. He twisted the ends of his moustache like an old timey villain and bent down to be closer to me.

"Oh hey there, lil miss-"

Before he could finish, I felt myself get pulled backwards onto Zoro's chest. I looked up at Zoro, startled. He had locked eyes with Kebab Dude, as if daring him to finish his sentence. I suppose the daggers from Zoro's glare had hit its mark, since Kebab raised his hands in a surrender and walked away. Whoops. I should really be more careful.

Zoro subtly walked us closer to the stall of lanterns, and pretended to look bored as I cooed over the intricate designs. I pointed out one that looked suspiciously like Luffy's straw hat. Zoro agreed that it was unlicensed merchandise. He bought me the butterfly lantern, I bought him one shaped like a sake bottle, and we both continued strolling down the street each holding our lanterns, looking like overgrown children. 

I wondered if he was bothered that someone tried to hit on me. I swung his hand as we ambled on, resisting the urge to bring it up. Oh, look, dumplings. Ahh, the shooting game. 

...Heck, why resist it? I decided the only way to find out was to tease him about it.

"So everyone wants me, huh? What do you think of that?"

Zoro snorted. Hey! Excuse me! How rude. I gasped in mock offense and attempted to pull my hand out of his grasp to emphasise my point. He tightened his grip and looked down at me, a serious look on his face. I sniffed rebelliously, turning my nose up haughtily into the air.

"Sanji would agree I was a catch. I should date Sanji."

"You wouldn't," Zoro stated matter-of-factly, his eyes now on a table precariously full of ceramic bowls.

"You're right, I wouldn't." I paused, giving the matter some thought. "If I were to date anyone in the Straw Hats, who would it be? BESIDES you." I added this last part with a roll of my eyes, after seeing him innocently point a finger at himself.

He retracted the finger and we strolled in silence for two seconds as he considered the options. Kebab Dude sprinted past, a man dressed as a giant kebab hot on his heels. We pretended not to see them.

"Luffy."

"Yeah! And you would date..." I stared at his side profile intently, looking for an answer somewhere in that handsome visage. A small smile emerged, probably from sensing my searching stare. "Nobody," I concluded. Zoro nodded, looking impressed. I chuckled, internally patting myself on the back, wondering if we should stop for dango as a celebration. Now where were the dango stalls? Zoro suddenly stopped walking. I looked back up at him in surprise.

"Hey," Zoro said gruffly. He had turned to face me again, the serious look back on his face. "Don't ever let go of my hand again unless you really mean to, okay?" 

I felt my eyes widen in surprise. Of course. 

"Of course," I said aloud. His face relaxed into a smirk. It was suddenly too clear to me how much I liked him. Heat rose to my cheeks. I love you. No. Too forward. God, you're hot. True, but still. I'm horny for you. Was that even it anymore? Argh, quick, say something.

"I.. I like you a lot."

Now it was his turn to widen his eyes. Then his expression softened. He smiled; a gentle smile. Calm. At ease.

"I like you a lot too."

We both looked at each other for a long while, then started walking again, hand in hand, in search of dango.


	10. Do Not Engage

It was only a matter of time before it came to this. It was One Piece after all. What was traveling with a famous pirate crew without a few scuffles? Or fights? Or full-on battles?

Unfortunately for everyone, I was an office worker. I had never fought a battle in my life nor come close to winning in Halo on split screen mode. So it wasn't unexpected for me to be down for the count pretty early on. God, my head hurt. I slumped over, relaxing my shoulders. Sharp hard edges of rock dug into my back. I felt my eyes start to close. 

"Hey, hey."

I opened my eyes blearily. Usopp was standing a distance away from me, aiming at something far away. He didn't seem to have noticed me. A navy man was sneaking up behind him, a tight grip on his sword. Usopp loosed his bullet. An explosion sounded off in the distance. He looked pleased. The man raised his sword. Ugh, Usopp, look out! Shield. A shield. He should have a shield. Argh, my head. 

I watched helplessly as a shoddily-made Captain America shield materialised in between the blade and Usopp's head. He noticed the object falling over his head at the last minute and somehow managed to grasp the handles to hide his body under it, narrowly avoiding getting thunked on the head by low quality vibranium. Or, to be fair, being split apart like firewood. I shut my eyes and breathed out my nose slowly. Who was talking to me? 

"Hey baby we gotta go." I gave up trying to sleep away my pain. Zoro was examining my face, worry written all over his handsome, but slightly bloodied features. I had a vague suspicion it wasn't his blood. He offered a hand for me to grab to stand up. 

"Marimo, boost!" Sanji sprinted into view, and Zoro automatially stuck a palm out for Sanji's shoe to land on, before yeeting the suit into a cluster of navy men. Hot. I reached out to grab his proffered hand, then proceeded to just hold on to it. Wouldn't it be weird if we just had sex right now. His hand is so big. Zoro paused, then tried to tug on my arm gently. Nope. Nausea washed over me like an ocean wave. Air escaped my torso and mouth in a quiet, sour burp. Thick sweat? made a slow descend down my temple. I pulled my arm back. Nope. Not leaving this rock. 

"Guys!" Nami's shout came from somewhere far across the battlefield. Thunder followed. Was it raining? "We have to leave _now_!" I looked up at Zoro. He shot an infuriated look in Nami's direction, before violently slashing at a sailor who was trying to jump onto him. The limp body flopped onto the ground with a dull thud. Zoro faced me now. The concern had evolved to desperation. His fists were clenched as if he were resisting the urge to do something.

"A warrior's path is always forward. Remember? You told me that."

Hm? The Irwin kids' TV show's new tagline? Why was he telling me this. Is Steve Irwin alive in this universe? Another damned sailor was charging to attack Zoro from the back, their heavy footsteps thumping louder and louder towards us. Zoro rolled his eyes and started to turn, before a giant rock blinked into existence in between the two of them. Zoro stared at the offending geological anomaly for a second, his sword raised uselessly in front of it, before raising frustrated, questioning hands at me.

"Why?! Why another rock? You have one right here!"

"Two rock." I raised my hand up in a peace sign to demonstrate.

Zoro let out an exasperated noise and vaulted over the rock to get rid of our attackers. I could hear him roaring at someone to just carry me off to safety. Dang it. I was being burdensome. I had to do something so they didn't have to worry about me anymore. Oh. Easy. Duh. 

"WHY FOUR ROCKS?!" 

Zoro's yell was the last thing I heard as I sat snug and sealed away in my rock room, before everything went black.

It was cold. A gust of wind blew hair into my face. I reached up to brush it out of my face. Ack, my arm. When did I hurt it? I tore my eyes from my bandaged arm to stare at the blank rock in front of me, mildly embarrassed. Why was I lying here? What happened? I should get up. I shifted.

"Oh, you're up!" Chopper trotted hurriedly towards me, clutching a blood-splattered cloth. Ew. The ground was covered in drops of blood. It was even on my shirt; in fact my clothes were drenched in the stuff. Oh God. Wait. This was my blood. I felt faint. What the fuck. There was so much. Was I dying? Was I about to die? Chopper waved his hooves in my face in a panic.

"No, no! You've stopped bleeding, it's okay now!" I tried to nod at Chopper's reassuring whispers, but the throb in my head stopped me. Ow. I looked around. Chopper had somehow managed to squeeze into my little rock house to treat me, wh-

What. 

The first rock that I had made was cut off at a 45 degree angle, a clean slash that rendered that 'wall' of my room effectively useless. Outside this makeshift hospital ward were about half the crew. I opened my mouth to call out to them, but Chopper rapidly shook his head and raised a hoof to his mouth, I supposed in a "shh" motion.

"There are more navy men around," he whispered, as his gaze darted around the room suspiciously. "Robin says she can hear them looking for us." Chopper pressed his lips together, while his eyes continued to frantically search for hidden threats. More navy men? Crap. No wonder Nami was so desperate for us to leave this island. I peered out over the sliced rock. The crew members out there were deep in... silent conversation. They were moving so animatedly, yet no sound was being made. It was like watching a silent film. Or actually, more accurately, charades. Which I so happened to be really good at. Game on.

Okay so Franky's uhhh.. Carrying a backpack. He has wide shoulders, tall- No, he's big. He can carry the backpack and.. do high knees? No he can carry the backpack and run! Oh he's pointing at me. OH OH Franky is a big guy so he can carry me on his back and get away! Ooh, Zoro isn't happy about that. He's just shaking his head no. Me, him. Oh, I'm his? ...I'm his responsibility! Okay, no one is happy with that idea. Sanji's turn. Zoro, slash slash. Franky, backpack high knee. Ah! Zoro will fight the sailors, Franky carry me to safety. Huge breasts.. Oh, Nami. Nami will row a boat, no, Nami will get the Sunny to.. pick up Franky, and then Zoro you join later. Sanji will be with Zoro. 

"WHY SHOULD I-"

"SHHH!!!"

Zoro crossed his arms and scowled. I conjured up a whiteboard and marker and handed them off to Chopper. Sanji received my gift and blew me a kiss. Dodging a punch from Zoro, Sanji wrote: "Do not engage. Let Sanji and Moss deal with them. Get to the ship as quickly as possible."

Right. Of course. Easy peasy.


	11. Ham Bone

I lightly tapped the crisp surface of homemade lasagna with my fork to enjoy the hollow sound it made. My parents made the best lasagna. Mom tightened her arm around me beaming, before disappearing back into the kitchen, Ham Bone trotting closely behind her in anticipation. Dad was showing off his prized baseball trophies with unbridled enthusiasm not seen since the New Neighbour Introduction two years ago. He patted the back of the man next to him with a guffaw. My friends called from the couch, complaining that the TV was broken.

"We're so proud of you for starting your own family, dear," beamed my mother as she placed a dish of green beans down in front of me. Huh? I looked down at myself. When did I start playing with the stiff lace on this.. wedding dress? And there was my wedding ring, a single black strip around the ring finger of my right hand. Dad was giving a speech on the deck of the Sunny. I turned to my husband. Zoro smiled back at me, a gentle faraway look in his eyes. The crew was seated at the dining table with us, enjoying the feast. Mom was no longer standing by my chair. Waves splashed against the side of the ship. I looked back at the deck. Dad wasn't there anymore.

"I should go home some time," I felt myself say. Zoro looked confused.

"Home? Is this not your home?"

I awoke with a start to yelling. I blinked blearily. A small group of rough-looking men stood before us, twirling knives in their hands and looking predatory. One of them had his knife pointed at Franky's nose, too close for comfort. I tightened my grip around his neck.

We were getting threatened by pirates? Pirates?! _We_ were pirates!

"Hey, I know you! You're robot Franky! Ya got a bounty!" piped up a pirate standing off to the side, spit dangling from his mouth. "This your girl?" He stepped towards us, wiping at the spit from his face with the back of his hand. A thick dangle of saliva clung stubbornly to his beard. He leered at me with hunger in his deranged eyes.

Chopper immediately moved to stand between us with a frown as deep as his reindeer features would allow as I resisted the urge to duck behind Franky. 

"I'm a cyborg," muttered Franky under his breath, the gusto drained out him. Usually, Franky would SUPER his way into a fight with these guys, but not this time. He let his shoulders sag, and readjusted my weight on his back. He seemed to be tired of fighting. He probably wanted badly to wriggle out of this unscathed, if possible.

"She's not my girlfriend," he clarified, in a louder Let's Be Reasonable We're All Pirates Here voice. An idea seemed to strike him as he spoke. His tone turned smug, lifting his chin up to look down at the group. "She's Zoro's girlfriend."

The realisation hit them like a slap to some ill-placed dominoes. Fear rippled around the crowd like falling dominoes. The pirates exchanged anxious glances like anxious dominoes. The one who had issued the first challenge gulped. "Zoro as in... Pirate hunter Roronoa Zoro?!"

"The one and only. And he gave me super strict instructions to take care of her, so." Franky shrugged nonchalantly. He flicked some dirt off his nail. "You wanna try attacking her?"

Alarmed whispers arose from the group, not one willing to incur the wrath of the infamous swordsman. I had to admit, it made me feel pretty good. Take that, loser pirates. My boyfriend could cut you up. Literally. Watch yourself.

"You win this time, robot!" The pirates fell over each other in their haste to get away, their lives prioritised over the bounty they assumed they could have robbed from us. Chopper glared at their receding backs. Franky sighed deeply and proceeded to lower me to the ground carefully once they were out of sight. Chopper quickly scurried to his side to check on him.

"I'm fine. Just tired."

That took the wind right out of my sails. I was throwing a wrench into their operations. The crew shouldn't have to lug me around, this burden of a crew member who could only file disciplinary reports, and not kick pirate ass when needed. I looked down at Snagg's black ring, snug around the ring finger on my right hand.

I should go home someday.

Two seconds after we made it back to the ship a hand gripped my arm and pulled me into the bathroom. I felt my back press flat against the wall.

"Hey." Zoro's muscled arm was held against the wall right next to my face, effectively caging me in. He smirked down at me. His green hair was tousled. His pupils were blown wide. There was a small cut on his cheek. He leaned in to kiss me, but I reached out to touch his face, stopping him. My thumb smoothed over his mostly healed cut. Still so handsome. He took my hand and quirked an eyebrow. I didn't know how to explain myself. Why don't I want to kiss him..? I mean, a lot was running through my head. How was I supposed to tell him my time was running out? More importantly, how did I get myself into this in the first place? How had I let myself get caught up in getting into a relationship with this man when I knew full well I had an expiration date? 

Generally, I would pick being kabedon'd to within an inch of my life over having one simple talk any day, but this wasn't the same. Echoes of the dream bounced around my brain. 

Zoro didn't ask. I could tell he really wanted to, his mouth opening and shutting in hesitation. Nothing. All he did was offer a hand, in invitation to dinner. I grabbed it and followed him out of the bathroom. 

Chopper stood on the dinner table, holding everyone's attention with a riveting tale about our journey. Specifically, that we ran into some navy men who didn't recognise us as the Straw Hat pirates, and demanded to know our name. Franky had struggled to come up with a fake name and ended up going with "Super... Uh, Cutty". Usopp got a real kick out of that. ("Super Cutty?!" he howled. Franky proceeded to kick him under the table.)

I sat quietly rearranging my food, picking at the fruit salad Sanji had piled onto my plate. One of the solutions to my problem that I had previously considered was asking Snagg to invent a pill that would let me stay here forever. But was that wise? If I stayed here forever, my body there.. Well I suppose I would be dead. Was it responsible for me to subject my parents to that? Maybe it was good that I would wake up in however many hours and return to my life. Some scalloped potatoes slid into view. I looked up. It was Zoro. He wasn't even glancing in my direction, he just did it while scooping himself some potatoes. He was in fact nodding at something Brook was saying. 

I looked back down at my plate. The food started to swim. My nose was running. Huh. I sniffled. Something wet streaked down my cheek. Nami happened to look over at me as the first tear fell. 

"Oh! What's wrong?" she gasped, dropping the broccoli serving spoon to put an arm around me, examining my face. Oh God. More tears joined their friend down my cheek. There was no stopping this.

"I dunno I just.. I miss Ham Bone!" I was sobbing now. Hot tears were streaming down my face uncontrollably. A shocked and worried hush fell around the table. Chopper pulled chopsticks out of his nose. The silence lasted less than a second.

"Don't cry, my love! We have a ham bone! Right here," volunteered Sanji. He plucked a huge drumstick from Luffy's limp hand, extending it to me gingerly as if he was trying to comfort a cornered monkey with a dripping ice-cream cone. Luffy turned to Usopp, pointing at himself as if to ask if this was his fault, since he had consumed most of the ham. Usopp frowned. He hadn't noticed that the ham was gone.

"Don't call her your love," growled Zoro, snatching the drumstick from Sanji. His anger dissolved like cotton candy in water when he observed my heaving sobs. Worry wormed its way into his facial expression. He waved the drumstick uncertainly. "H..Here baby, here's a.. a ham bone?"

I stared at the meat. Even through my tears it was obvious that a giant bite had already been taken out of it. I shook my head as Luffy attempted to switch out the half-gnawed drumstick for a chunk of ham he'd found on the table, Zoro shouldering him out of the way. I reached for a tissue to wipe my nose. Hold on. I held my hand in front of me as if seeing it for the first time. The black ring around my ring finger looked back at me.

Time for a call back home.


	12. Wounds on the Back are a Swordsman's Shame

"Two years? You're only here for two years?"

I nodded, head bowed. A hush fell over the group at my words. I fiddled with the black ring around my finger to have something to do with my hands. I briefly wondered if they even cared. I stole a glance at their faces. 

Damn it. Everyone looked grim. A hug circled my elbow. I looked down to see Chopper with his arms wrapped tight around my arm. His teary eyes looked back at me as he violently snorted up the snot escaping his nose.

I bent down to return the reindeer's embrace. My heart ached at the crew's kindness. "Would they care?"? That was a dumb thought. This was the Straw Hat crew. I hadn't been here more than a couple months and they had already started treating me like part of them. Their M.O. was caring for people they barely knew. That's how people who follow their story get so attached to them, right? That was why I was even here. It was almost enough to restart my weeping again.

Robin was the first to break the silence.

"If, as you say, your friend can make you stay here permanently, what is wrong with leaving your corpse there? They had you alive for that many years. At least they'll have the body," said Robin, confused that I hadn't already come to this conclusion. She was oblivious to the perplexed looks cast her way.

"Maybe they can find some way to multiply you?" Chopper suggested with a sniffle. Usopp nodded furiously. The room erupted in proposals for what I could do. I felt a single tear roll down my cheek. I couldn't help it. This crew... No words.

I stood up, the legs of my chair scraping dramatically on the floor. Everyone turned to look at me quizzically for interrupting their brainstorming session. 

"I.. I just wanted to thank you guys for everything you've done for me, and loving me like a member of your crew." I bowed before them. "Thank you very much. I will never forget you." I couldn't look up at their faces. I could only stare at the fine lines of the wooden table disappear into a blur of different shades of brown.

There was another solemn silence as they digested my resignation. Luffy got up and walked to stand by me. He clapped me on the back as I straightened. 

"Thank you," grinned Luffy. "For being a part of our crew."

The sound of a glass bottle slamming on the table cut through the ensuing silence like a sword through flesh. Zoro stood at the end of the table, one hand gripping a massive bottle of Hibiki whiskey, averting his eyes from me.

"Let's drink."

The room descended into drunken hiccups and slurred words in less than an hour. Alcohol disappeared into their mouths at speeds unmet by the rest of mankind. It was frankly terrifying.

A teacup clinked onto the patch of floor in front of me, forcing me to tear my gaze from Luffy's spontaneous frenetic rain dance. I looked up to see Brook with another teacup in his hands. He gestured for me to take a sip from the floor cup. I raised it to my lips. Ack! It was whiskey. As I coughed, Brook took a slow, calm seat next to me with an unreasonably nonchalant air for someone who was drinking alcohol out of fine china.

"I just thought it appropriate to let you know this, now that you may leave us at any time." I glanced at him. Brook studied me with a surprisingly piercing look for someone with no eyes. Damn, he was serious. I held my breath in anticipation. "I have always wanted to see your panties. Good day." He collapsed onto the floor in a heap of bones before I could respond to this groundbreaking confession.

"Are we all confessing stuff to New Girl?" Franky stumbled into the conversation, taking a seat next to Brook's drooling head. I wondered where the saliva was coming from. It was probably alcohol. Franky picked up the teacup I abandoned, body swaying dangerously to the side, and casually downed its contents. He pointed the cup at me. "Listen, N.G.. I had to put you down earlier not because I was tired. I could feel your boobs on my back and I almost got a bo-"

I felt an arm grab me and haul me to my feet. I was dragged backwards out of the room. Franky, looking around to realise he was talking to nobody, fell over and took a nap on Brook.

The bathroom door slammed shut behind us. My back was once again plastered against the wall. But it felt different this time.

Zoro's arm caged me in protectively as usual, but he refused to look me in the eye. In fact, he wasn't even facing me. He glared at a clearly offensive wash cloth as I stood wringing my arms. Silence.

"Are you drunk?" I asked, trying to decrypt Zoro's expression from his side profile. He shook his head. A beat. Finally - finally - he turned to meet my gaze. He put a hand on my cheek, looking... what was this look?

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Sad. I'd never seen him look... Sad. His eyes bore into mine, but they looked searching, desperate; behind them blazing their usual intensity. His hands gripped my arms, almost too tightly, as if I would slip away if he relinquished even an ounce of his strength. My heart lurched. Fuck. I opened my mouth to respond, but no words came out. His eyes snapped back to the offending wash cloth, frustrated.

"_Why_ didn't you tell me?" he repeated, slamming a fist into the wall next to my head. My eyebrows shot up. He whipped back round to me. There was something else in his expression. The intensity I saw earlier blazed brighter than ever, his eyes flashing with...

Anger.

Shit. My last shred of self-preservation reminded me that it was probably wise that I be scared, being in an enclosed area with a furious, incredibly skilled swordsman with triceps on his biceps and rage in his heart. But my trust in Zoro kicked that notion to the curb. He wouldn't hurt me. I knew that better than I knew myself. 

Unfortunately, I also knew that this wasn't entirely the reason I felt safe. In all bitter, shameful honesty, this was..kind of hot. I immediately kicked myself for harbouring this thought. Get out, thought. Ugh, I was stalling - it was time to tell him the truth.

"I didn't want to tell you," I mumbled, hoping against hope that maybe he wouldn't hear me. No chance. His frown deepened, almost incredulously. 

"I didn't want to have to leave you," I continued shakily. I knew this sounded absurd. It wasn't like hiding it from him would have prevented my leaving. I supposed my telling the crew, and especially Zoro, would... Solidify it for me. Make it real. I had refused to tell them in a futile attempt to escape this reality. 

Zoro's fists tightened against the wall.

I couldn't avoid him forever. I met his gaze, chin tipped up almost in a challenge, but I could feel myself shaking.

"Zoro..." The unmistakable quaver in my voice tore my bravado apart. 

He rammed his fist against the wall once more, with less force this time, and left the bathroom. The door swung shut behind him with a bang.

I let my body slide down the wall until I was seated on the cold floor. I didn't want to cry anymore. I rubbed at my face. This was entirely my fault, start to end. It was appalling how much it hurt to realise that you couldn't find a solution to a problem borne of your own hands. I was its creator. Didn't it figure that a solution could come from me too? I supposed not. 

Still, I... I dunno, I had no real regrets. These friends I've made, memories we've forged... They were all worth this anguish. I remember the time Sanji pretended to be my boyfriend to scare off those weird teens by kissing me on the cheek, only for Zoro to cut a deep gash into his suit jacket for his efforts. Sanji wasn't hurt, but was deeply offended for days at the disrespect for his suit until Zoro reluctantly gave him part of his allowance as compensation. There was also that time Chopper really wanted to take a selfie (selly, he called it) on my phone, then we found Zoro in the background of one, mid sneeze. We blew it up and printed it out to put inside the fridge, which annoyed him immensely, but I caught him smiling at it once while getting himself a drink. Though, I guess it wasn't all rainbows and butterflies. Who could forget that one time I got caught up drawing a castle floorplan for Nami? We were swarmed by navy men trying to stop us and Zoro had fought them off one armed and seated. When I was done, a moat of unconscious navy men had formed around us and Zoro's arm was still held protectively around me. Didn't want to risk people attacking me while he was fighting elsewhere, he said. When I opened my mouth to complain he just kissed me.

Zoro Zoro Zoro. Why was he in all my treasured memories here? Ugh, I was pathetic.

The bathroom door slammed back open. GRAH! Jesus Christ! Wait was I interrupting someone coming in for a drunken puke _oh God_-

Something soft slapped my face as it flew past me, landing on the bathroom floor with a gentle thud. I reached out to unfold it. A futon? I looked up at the pitcher of sleep essentials responsible for this aerial attack. 

"Zoro?"

I was suddenly shoved backwards onto the futon with the force of a tsunami. The impact was absorbed by the futon, but the cushiony landing did not soften the shock of the attack. Zoro caged me in with his body, his eyes the most fiery that I had ever seen them. God, should I be finding it as hot as I did? I resisted the urge to wrap my legs around his waist. He reached into his pocket and dug around in it. What was this man doing?!

Zoro proceeded to pull out a condom. I looked at it in disbelief.

"Where the hell did you get a condom?!"

"Does it matter where I got a condom?"

I continued to gape at him. Then I got his meaning. We didn't have much time. Either we did whatever we wanted while we still could, or be coy and dance around each other and lose the chance forever. I reached for his clothes and started trying to pull them off. He raised an eyebrow. I pulled his head closer and kissed him deeply.

"Nope," I said breathlessly. "Let's do this."

I didn't know how much time had passed. I also didn't care. We lay surrounded in abandoned clothes for a good while before Zoro let go of my hand to get in the bath. I watched his muscled back as he stood. Oh. Uh oh. Oops.

He turned and offered a hand to help me up. Noticing my expression, he paused. 

"What?" he asked, blissfully ignorant of what I had done.

I opened my mouth. How should I put it? I considered the bloodied scratch marks tainting his back, courtesy of my pretty, but clearly deadly painted talons. Maybe he didn't need to know? 

I shook my head guiltily. Zoro shrugged and got into the shower, turning to hide his smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Franky: sex would be so super except for the all the babies it makes  
NG: wat. here.
> 
> And then I suppose they passed the condom around for show and tell


	13. Date Detour

It was time to call back home. I had informed my crew, informed my captain, informed my boyfriend. I was ready to face my options. Ring on finger, I decided to head out to a bar because I thought, you know, Snagg would probably get a kick out of seeing a bar in One Piece.

I climbed off the ship and landed on the shore. As I was about to set off, a thump followed, splashing rough sand onto my shins. Who goes there? 

Zoro dusted himself off from his landing. He nodded at me casually like I was an acquaintance that he happened to run into while out and about. Dork. I attempted to hide my amusement. He walked up to me and breezily took my hand. Okay, guess I had a witness for this meeting.

Or, it was time for a date detour!

Zoro seemed to agree with my unspoken desire to distract myself from the situation at hand, since he didn't question why we were entering shops and winding through the streets in this town we'd docked at instead of heading straight to the local bar. Hey, I had made peace with my situation. Didn't mean I was happy about it. Let a girl have her distractions.

I was busy examining some sun dials at a stall when Zoro tugged on my hand. I looked up. He was staring at some hair accessories. He gestured vaguely at the selection of jeweled hairpins, so I picked one up and clipped it to his hair. Unamused, he turned to glare at me. A fringe stood straight up from his face, held in place by a swan hairclip. Beautiful. A work of art. I whipped my phone out to take a photo. He allowed me two seconds before he reached out and swiped the phone away.

"Look at them, dumbass," grumbled Zoro as he turned back to the accessories, not bothering to remove the offending hairclip. I obeyed. Oh! A delicate hair pin caught my eye, its emerald sheen making it hard to ignore. I picked it up and admired its unique sword pattern: its blade stabs into your hairdo! I loved it. Its price tag dangled ominously. Here we go.. Jesus! I reluctantly stabbed the hairpin back into its foam cube. What's the point spending so much money on these material goods which I couldn't even bring back with me?

Zoro immediately ripped the pin out from where I had just put it. I looked up at him in surprise. He examined it as I shook my head.

"Zoro, I can't get this. What's the point? I can't take it with me."

"So what?" Zoro raised the hairpin. "So what if you won't live here in a couple years? You live here now. Don't you deserve to have something nice while you're here, now?" I felt my hair stand on end. He was right. Live in the moment. Yeah, maybe dumb purchases wouldn't be wise for the future, but I could always spare a thought for the me that exists now. And if something small made me happy now, why should I deny myself that pleasure? Still.. it's a lot of money...

Zoro sensed my hesitation and slammed the pin down in front of the stall owner.

"This, please."

"Zoro, no. It's fine, really. I don't need this."

Zoro turned to me and looked me in the eye.

"You deserve to be happy. And if you're not going to be the one to make yourself happy, then I will do it."

He reached decisively for his money. Tears started to form in my eyes, but they stopped short as I remembered why we were in this tussle in the first place.

"Zoro, this hairpin is like, ten thousand berries."

"Oh."

The hairclip in his hair flopped over as if on cue.


	14. Square One

We walked on, hand in hand, my hair held in a bun held together by a miniature green sword. It wasn't more than ten steps before we stopped short at the town bar. We were here. It was time. No more distractions. I pursed my lips in hesitation. Now that I was really here, about to discuss solutions for my dilemma, it felt real. Like the problem was finally real and at my doorstep, and it had physically manifested as this busy bar right in front of me. No ice-cream on the deck or sex in the bathroom could help me avoid it now.

Zoro gave my back a gentle nudge. He jerked his head toward the open door, but made no move to enter it himself.

I had to do it myself. I got that. I tightened my grip on his hand and stepped in.

"Zolo. Hey. Big fan."

I rolled my eyes, resisting the urge to pour out the beer where his black ring currently resided. Zoro quirked an eyebrow like he couldn't quite put his finger on why his name sounded weird in Snagg's mouth, but nodded his greeting politely anyway. Snagg turned to me. I raised my brows at him over the beer.

"Wanna share your notes?"

My mild annoyance dissipated almost instantaneously. Right! I was a beta tester after all. It was exciting to be able to help with research. We fiddled with USB cables and the laptop Snagg happened to be carrying. Zoro folded his arms and watched passers-by as we worked, glaring at some of the people walking in. His swords clinked ominously. I missed the internet. I briefly wondered what memes I was missing out on, before realising that it hadn't even been a full day since I took the pill. Wow. Time sure is fucked up, huh?

As my phone dutifully chugged away transferring files to Snagg's laptop, I explained my problem. Came here. Made friends. Happy. Gotta leave. Big sad. 

"Well, the time limit is a dosage thing. I could always give you a larger amount and... Ah. I see the issue."

He sat for a moment after this revelation with his forehead balanced on his fingertips, head bowed, his arms forming a pyramid on the table. It was best not to speak to Snagg while he was deep in thought. If you wanted to be heard, that is. To pass the time Zoro and I quietly pulled Snagg's laptop toward us and attempted to fix red eye on a photo of Usopp drunk-singing to a crab. It quickly devolved to drawing facial hair and horns with the pen tool. 

It was when Zoro eagerly started flicking through my album for images of Sanji to vandalise when Snagg dropped his hands to the table. Our heads snapped up in unison. 

"I think I might have a solution to your problem."

I shifted excitedly in my seat. Yesss. The sound of footsteps heading towards us registered vaguely in my brain. I ignored it. I was too excited. I knew I could count on Snagg. Well, no, I didn't, but I was glad he came through anyway. Zoro suddenly slammed the laptop closed and shoved it at Snagg. We both jumped in surprise.

A towering figure hovered at our table threateningly. I had to tilt my head up to see his face, but before I could get a good look, a hard metal item hit me across the face with such force that my head spun. I whipped my head back to glare at my assailant, only to see a black ring being tossed my way. I caught it with surprising ease. I turned to look across the booth. Snagg was gone. His laptop and USB cables had all vanished off the surface of the polished wood. It was as if I had imagined his presence. 

Zoro had risen to confront our attacker, but he was being pushed down by the shoulder with a heavy revolver. The floor cracked under his feet. His hand slipped on the hilt of his swords. A look of mildly disguised surprise flit across his face. Fuck.

"Roronoa Zoro's girlfriend, huh?" The revolver found its way to my temple. _Fuck._ The cold surface of the gun and everything it stood for sent a chill down my spine. I heard it click as I looked into Zoro's eyes. Even fear looked good on his handsome face. 

Everything went black.

I sat up, eyes flying open in a panic.

A searing pain ripped through my head. Was he okay? I reached a hand up to my temple. The moment my fingers made contact the pain disappeared like it was never there. Hm? Was who okay?

I reached for my phone and woke it up to look at the time. Instead of my Zoro wallpaper, a text notification greeted me.

"Yo you guys ok? What happened?" It was from Snagg.

Snagg? Huh? _What_ happened?

I looked around. The air in my room was still. Everything remained exactly the same as I had left it. I ran a hand through my hair in confusion. Something caught in the strands. Ow. I ruffled my updo to release whatever it was. A tiny green sword fell out. A sword? I picked it up. A rush of emotions coursed through my veins. My heart felt like it was snapped in a bear trap, the intensity almost physically throwing me back. I struggled to breathe. Ice cream. Hold my hand. I love you. Wait, what? 

...

Nothing. Just as suddenly as the thoughts came, they were gone. I must have dreamed them. But they seemed too real, like they were drawing from the depths of memories of a previous life, memories that were falling away from me like sand through my fingers. I tried to grasp at them, but to no avail. The aching constriction in my chest eased immediately, as if it wasn't tearing itself apart just microseconds ago. I clutched the sword tighter, as if it would give me a clue. What was that? Ice? Was there something about ice? I shook my head to clear my mind. A Tupperware sitting on my desk caught my eye.

Oh right! I took the pill like a couple hours ago. And... here I was. In my room. I sighed, throwing the sword onto my desk. I was right to have doubted Snagg. I chuckled to push aside my slight disappointment as I unlocked my phone to reply his text.

"It doesn't work, you fraud."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This work was written for me to show myself that I could still finish writing projects. It was starting to seem like I could never finish my projects, then I remembered that the last time I actually finished a work in progress was when I put it online, so I made an AO3 account and tried it. It worked! I'm glad I did it. Your comments have been so lovely and even clicking through has helped encourage me to write. Thank you for coming along on this ride.


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